October 17, 2004: Nargile, Champaign, IL

It was a Sunday night in mid October.  We were still under the impression that it was a worth-while venture to find the 'hottest spot' in a given town and pass out flyers to potential fans.  Because we are an amazing band and if we could get people to see us, surely they would fall instantly in love.  The 'hot spot' in Champaign?  Green Street.  No doubt.  It is the classic college town 'strip.'  Every one has a spot very similar to this one.

Unfortunately for us, only half of the band is at all interested in meeting new people on the street.  Half of the other half feels like a complete tool having to peddle hisself to people and the other quarter of this other half is struggling not to have a complete nervous breakdown and is threatening, first of all, not to play the show and, further, to quit the band altogether! 

Oh, conflict! 

Nonetheless, after a meal consisting of Jimmy Johns day old bread we were off to the venue: a hookah bar! 

Drive around for a while.
Find the place.
Unload.
Set up.

Free Drinks!  Awesome! 

'What do you have on tap?'
'Miller Light, something, something, Blue Moon.'
'Blue Moon!?'
'Yep'
'Give me one of those!'

Fortunately for half of the band, only half of the band drank at this point in our history.  So while the typical two drink limit is usually kind of a bummer, in this case, it worked out pretty well.  Matt and Paul get 4 drinks each tonight!  I proceeded to get right on that!

The night was starting to look up since the flyer debacle.  Matt, being sort of a local, had quite a few friends show up.  He split a hookah with some folks and started to feel really good about the show.  And of course about all the free alcohol he was receiving! 

Blue Moon
Blue Moon

Show time!  Gotta get one more free Blue Moon before we play!

Needless to say, it was awesome!  The Jamaican sound guy did a surprisingly amazing job at making us sound good!  It was probably one of the best shows we had ever played!  Flawless! All-encompassing! We were happy and, fortunately for half of us, he--the sound guy--and the Jamaican owner of the club were happy too! 

Free shots!!! 

'Tequilla?'
'...Well, I am not so sure that is a great idea...but...Free???'
'Free!'
'What the hell!  Let's do it!'

By the time the next and last band of the night was playing, the room was definitely exhibitting the characteristics of my new gravity. 

'You guys were awesome!  Want another drink?'
'Uhhhhhh....sure.  Blue Moon?'
'Gotcha!'

(internal dialogue)
'Uhhhhhhh....can't...drink....any more...
...must!...drink!....free booze!...
...room....sideways...'

The band finishes up and we start putting our stuff back in the mini-van.  Joey, tired; Sam, breaking down; Paul, having the time of his life; Matt, not helping very much...

(internal dialogue)
'Oh, man.  I don't feel so good...Ok, Ok!  Here is what you have to do!  Fall asleep!  That's it!  Just sleep!  You'll wake up in Greenville and everthing will be OK!  Yes!  Sleep!  ....Ohhhhh....sleep...beautiful sleep........'

(approximate van dialogue)

'Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!'
'What's happening?'
'I think Matt just threw up all over himself!'
'Ohhhh, Gross!!!!'
'Pull over!  Pull over!'

Matt proceeded to continue vomitting indiscriminately...outside of the van.  Everyone else scrambled to clean up as best they could, including changing Matt's clothes.

So, there we were.  Matt half-naked, vomiting on the side of the road in the middle of a cold night in October.  Surely, this night could not get any more fucked up!

Sirens! 
Flashing blue and red lights?!?!?!?
Oh, shit!

'Have you boys been drinking?' 
'Uhhhhh....'
'I can smell it!   Don't tell me you haven't been drinking!'
'Don't worry!  Joey has not had a drop!;

It's true, fortunately for all the band, the Joey quarter had not drank at all the whole night and was the designated driver for Mr. Pukesalot.  Regardless, the FEMALE COP wanted Joey to take a breathalizer test...which he passed, of course! 

(Joey to the lady cop)
'Here!  Have a few CDs!'

Back in the van. 
On our way back to Greenville. 
Make a quick stop in Tuscola to clean up a bit more. 
On the road!

Starts to rain.
There is no possible way this night could get any more fucked up....

Crash!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(van dialogue)
'What the fuck was that?'
'A car just ran into us!'
'Pull over'
'Call the Police!'

I wish I could tell you what happened over the next few hours, but, for some strange reason, all I remember is more flashing lights and people running around.  Apparently, we were hit by a drunk driver who 'fled the scene.'  Granted, their car that hit us was in the same parking lot that we were in...and the driver of the car was probably asleep in the hotel...and the passenger was trying to convince every one that nothing had happened. 

What an ironic night of shit. 

...and I had to go to class in St. Louis in the morning! 

Possible set: Tick Tock, Death, Crow/Love/Sunday Breakfast, Middle Man, Broken Machine, I Miss You, The Way (I'm Supposed to Be)

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Shows 2004


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